Poofy Goof Rant-O-Matic

looking photo software. must suck less than bins, iphoto, gallery, flickr, ...

• generate standard HTML for web output (preferably no javascript or AJAX)
  
• properly handle dependencies in a single-pass for generating web output (no recursing into directories, or unnecessary re-generating of pages or images)
  
• generate thumbnail pages
  
• generate scaled images based on pixel count, not "small" "med" "large" (images below an arbitrary limit shall not be further scaled down)
  
• get / save image information from EXIF tags
  
• get image information from text files (XML?)
  
• lossless database import and export into JTAG files with associated plaintext
  
• portable backup / restore of photo files and metadata
  
• distributed collaborative editing of photo files and metadata
  
• versioned editing of files
  

my goal is to feed piles of JPEG files to this thing, and run a query to allow me to add various tags to the photos including date, location, medium, people, etc. the fact that I have piles of existing photos to feed it along with bins' XML descriptions means I need command-line tools to be able to automate the process and migrate my existing data. I also don't want to be carting around a large database, hence the requirement to import and export from / to JPEG files with associated tag files.

update 2010-08-08

Kris is importing photos into iphoto on her mac today, and her grumblings and my frustrations reminded me that all photo library software still appears to suck. iphoto appears to be better than most, which isn't saying much. I lament the iphoto hole: all the things that make iphoto useful (editing, tags, album generation) don't easily make it back out. it's a one-way transfer. this is not what I want.

I really want a tool that lets me throw my photos into a virtual shoebox and facilitates me sorting them and sharing them with others. apparently such a thing is too much to ask.